It's All Right, I'll Be Fine, Don't Worry 'Bout This Heart of Mine...

Why is it that humans often become so bitter, so jaded, that they can no longer be happy for anyone else? At what point does one become so disengaged with other people's feelings that they will tread on them; just so that this other person must wallow in as much heartache, misery, and sorrow as they do?

I do not believe that I have become that person entirely. Last night reminded me that there are glimpses, and they are frightening.

I am ready to move on with this life. Time continues to go on and on, but I continue to spin my wheels, stuck in the mud that is my life in Bloomington. If the bitterness is already settling in, it can only get worse the longer that I stay. So for now I work overtime, I eat less, I socialize less - but I read more, I inquire about other career options or the possibility of going back to school, I save some money, I desire mor. At this stage that should be my core essence - developing a strategy for leaving Bloomington behind and starting my life. After all, my introduction in my blog does say that these are the rantings of a gay man whose life is in transition. Well it is time for the transition/transformation to begin...